Hatred
I saw you today. I was watching you.You never saw me
You'll never change. You talk about how God loves us so much and how we should love our neighbors as ourselves, but you walk by me without a glance as I cry my silent tears.
You're such a hypocrite! I try every day I see you to give you another chance. I know you can. You just don't care.
What can I change to make you love me
Talk to us about respecting the one talking-then you won't even respect me enough to talk to me.
I can't talk to you
You are so thoughtless. I was sitting in plan view of you, sobbing, and you walk by me without a kind word or at least an insincere "Are you okay?"
I'm never okay
What's wrong with you? You think that just because you have a great job and handsome features you can get away with being cruel to me?
You're so haughty
I don't know how you treat everyone else. I really don't care. I feel my pain, not theirs. And I feel it sharply. Much as I try to curl up inside myself, to hide my emotions from the world, I'm not made that way. My emotions come out, and there's nothing I can do about it.
I can't hide inside the lies
You want to know why I was crying today? I felt so useless. I can't even do my hated assigned job, for some unknown reason. I sacrifice my time, time when I could be doing other things for myself, to come and help you. I hate it with a passion, but I love you enough to keep going.
When you walked by, not caring, it fueled the self-worthless feeling eating at me.
Why doesn't he care? What have I done to make him hate me
Yes, I love you. I love you more than Life itself. I think about you constantly.
And yet, I'll be lucky if you even have a passing thought about me.
I'm not important enough to consume your time
I run like a racehorse to please you. You don't care. I've done everything I know how to make you notice.
Running in circles, I'm chasing my tail
I hate your self-confident smile. I know that behind it, you're crying out for love, just like me.
Can't hide forever
I'll love you for always and for ever. Whether you love me or not. You'll always be my special love.
Always and forever, love you for always
posted by Kathryn at
5/24/2006 11:33:00 PM
14 comment(s):
Who is this poem about might I ask?
By
Webmaster, at
11:52 PM
You might, but I might not answer. let me just say, I love him but he acts like I'm the source of the plauge.
Oh, well.
By
Kathryn, at
12:27 AM
Whoah, honey. I could go on and on about how to guard your heart, but I too have been guilty. Actually, this sounds like a situation I had when I was 14/15. Common story -- chubby nerd with glasses likes intelligent, handsome guy. Intelligent handsome guy turns out to be stupid handsome guy. Stupid handsome guy hurts chubby nerd with glasses. Chubby nerd with glasses hates stupid handsome guy ans swears she'll never love again, marry, blah blah blah.
Katy, you know what 1 Cor 13 says about love, so I'm not gonna preach at you, but I do encourage you to whole-heartedly pursue the Lover of your soul. Don't set yourself up for pain like that, dear. If this dude is like the source of the plague, what's so great about him that he merits your affection? This guy doesn't even sound worthy of you.
By
Carey, at
7:53 AM
Yeah, I defenitley fit the part of the chubby nerd with glasses. I did get new ones though, annd they're rimless. ^^
By
Kathryn, at
10:25 AM
Look...just focus on Christ and nothing else! Well...besides your school. Do not even bother getting into that stuff at your age. You are probably not even ready to make a commitment to marriage for another 8-9 years... so what would the point in getting a "boy friend" at your age be anyway. All that comes out of "relationships" at your age is hurt feelings! Besides, you are too good for that dude! *steps off soap box*
Carey is right; do not purposely set your self up for pain, because that is all that will happen at your age, with "relationships".
Proverbs 2:7
Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you by the gazelles and by the does of the field: Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires.
So, do not awaken love before it is time! *steps off soap box, again*
By
Webmaster, at
7:22 PM
HAHA. Yeah, I don't think he'd date me anyway, I really doubt that his wife and child would appreciate that.
But yeah. He's supposed to be a leader, who I'm supposed to be able to look up to and respect. Why is it that I can't?
By
Kathryn, at
9:26 PM
WHOA! Kate! I had no idea!!! I mean, I know who you're talking about! Katy, you DO NOT need his approval!!! I used to do the exact same thing! I would run in circles for him just to get "hey thanks or good job" But no. Yes, he is supposed to be a leader, but you are not here to "serve" him. You are here to do God's will. Jesus is THE ONLY ONE you have to worry about pleasing. And ya know what. He loves it. He is so proud of you. You are His pride and joy. Even if it doesn't seem like it. I'm not saying you should just ignore the leader, but to keep loving him in Christ. He does not look down on you. He doesn't think your just in the way. And as for "light bulb" I think he does appreciate what you do, but doesn't know how to show it. Or he is just concerned with his own group of people that he feels closer to. I really don't know. But take it from me, do not worry about what he thinks. What he thinks is worthless. You do not have to exhaust yourself over pleasing him. Instead invest that energy into pleasing God. I love you so much!! Remember: "those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." If you don't get it, think about it. I'll tell you Sat. I love you!
By
untamed, at
9:45 PM
I figured you'd know who I meant, love. Thanks so much. I'll try not to worry about it, thank you. <3
By
Kathryn, at
9:51 PM
Jeremy's is very right.
By
TheEarthCanBeMoved, at
11:13 PM
Too little, much too late
By
Kathryn, at
1:24 AM
Yeah, Jer is right. Good job, little bro! (Just remember that for yourself...lol)
The LORD is good to those who wait for Him, to the soul who seeks Him. It is good that one should hope and wait quietly for the salvation of the LORD. It is good for a man to bear the yoke in his youth. Let him sit alone and keep silent, because God has laid it on him. (Lamentations 3:25-28)
You just work on becoming a P-31 and you'll have guys lined up at the door! LOL, no seriously... just pursue the Lord. The right guy will see past physical flaws to see your beautiful character. A godly man will value a beautiful character above physical beauty. We can't do much to change the outside of our bodies -- unfortunately, we're stuck with this one until we are transformed -- but we will grow only more beautiful as we walk closer with our heavenly Bridegroom. You go, Katy! Let's be P-31s! LOL
By
Carey, at
7:42 AM
What is there about this man that you have problems with? Are you under him in some type of job? Is he an elder gentle man that you are trying to please?
By
Webmaster, at
10:32 PM
No, this man is a leader in our church. He works with the youth sometimes.
By
untamed, at
6:32 PM
Yeah. Thanks, Steph.
By
Kathryn, at
1:02 AM
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